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  • 弟子規夏令營 | 傳統文化公益論壇 | 中華經典 | 弟子規網 | 公益網

    教我們改善人際關系的好老師

    時間:2010-07-15 18:55來源:中國弟子規網 作者:弟子規 點擊:
    現代人常因人際關系緊張,感到心理負擔很重,或人生的壓力太大,我們有沒有想到從自己這邊行動起來,化解人際關系的沖突?改善與眾人的關系?如果有心的朋友,就會發現我們身

     

    現代人常因人際關系緊張,感到心理負擔很重,或人生的壓力太大,我們有沒有想到從自己這邊行動起來,化解人際關系的沖突?改善與眾人的關系?如果有心的朋友,就會發現我們身邊有一位無聲的老師。

    在寺院的山門、甚至許多商店中,我們會見到中央供奉的一尊菩薩像,他便是 「大肚能容,了卻人間多少事;滿腔歡喜,笑開天下古今愁」的彌勒菩薩。我們看他那笑咪咪的樣子,分明是在告訴我們:「要想人際關系和諧,先要笑臉迎人,不能發脾氣,一定要歡歡喜喜。」我們再看彌勒菩薩,他肚皮很大,代表什么都能包容,不與人計較。彌勒菩薩的形象就是教給我們要存平等心、呈喜悅相――對待任何人、任何事物,心理都歡歡喜喜、平平靜靜的,不要跟任何人計較。

    彌勒菩薩有著許多令人敬服的特質,他「豁達大度」的肚量為我們所共知。心胸寬大自然會能容納別人的意見;寬大的心胸,可以轉緊張的關系為和緩,可以化怨懟為友。有一回,釋迦牟尼佛的一位大弟子被一位婆羅門侮辱,但他對于婆羅門的辱罵只是充耳不聞,未予理會。因為他知道,一個會以辱罵別人來凸顯自己的人,在個人的修養和品行上都有問題。婆羅門見到他無端被自己辱罵,不但沒有生氣,且微笑地答辯,真不愧是圣者,終于自知理虧心虛地離開了。這便是豁達心胸的力量。

    彌勒菩薩教我們處人、處事均要大度一些。就拿穿鞋子來說吧,我們買鞋子都知道要多預留一點空間,否則穿久了,會因腳和鞋子磨擦得太厲害,而起水泡,或擠壓過度,以致痛苦難忍。人際關系也如此,如果心地豁達,什么都能包容,不與人計較,也一定能營造心情輕松的人際關系。

    我們都有過這種經驗,就是盛怒之后,再反省便會發現:「我當時也可以不必那么憤怒的,其實事情也不是那么嚴重,不知道他(受氣者)現在的感受如何?」但當遇到那種使人憤怒的情景時,往往會按捺不住怒火。因此,我們必須透過日常生活不斷地磨煉自己,使自己也擁有化解、疏導憤怒的智慧和能力。由于我們不是頓悟的圣者,便只有靠著時時關照自己內心的功夫,使自己臻于能忍辱、能容人的寬懷境界。

    我們還應該效法彌勒菩薩笑口常開的個性,并學習他用積極開朗的態度面對一切問題。在這充滿自私自利染污、過分宣揚競爭的繁華世界之中,唯有以最自然無爭的態度,并處處流露服務他人的意念,才能散發人性至真、至善、至美的光明面。日諺有云:「笑門福來。」如果你想要福氣的話,就在每天用真誠的笑容迎人吧!

    在與人相處時,多在心里想想彌勒菩薩,多在行為上效仿彌勒菩薩,您會發現另一番和諧、美好的新境界!

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